Simpler

Complications and conflicts
Disapated
Melting like high mountain snows
Come summer

With a newly rediscovered clarity
Everything was easier
The world felt simpler
My head and heart aligned like lovers

Decisions about passions and dreams
Became as obvious as a golden sunrise
Immaterial things consumed my spirit
My days would never ever be like before

A Tapping Specter

‘ere it was a darkened night
When my fears burned with frightening light
For I had heard a tap, tap, tapping
Upon my window

And that rapping, soft yet loud
Drummed into my mind
For fear that perhaps
That Raven had come

But nay, ‘twas no Raven
A specter, perchance?
Come from my nightmares
To haunt me

Made of my traumas
And my pains
Of my young mind
Being rent a ‘twain

Could it be
That a part of me
Could now be manifest?
Am I become a god?

To create from my own image?
To create so dark a creation
A reflection of my destruction?

Perhaps this is why
We hold not the keys
To creation

For to create from our image
May be to create
From a monster

Thunderstorm

We pretended that the rain would never end and built a fort of crumpled sheets and colored cushions, while we heard thunder of the world outside and hid in each other’s arms. We wove, sew, spun our thoughts into the other’s, in the form of sweet talk, kisses, promises and laughter, until the lightning struck.

Depression

Depression comes and goes

I feel the highest of the highest

But the lowest of the lowest

And it blows my soul and everything inbetween into pieces

Like a shattered mirror

That nagging feeling in my chest

Getting nearer

Threatening to be my undoing

So I lay in bed at night

Crying

And for what reason you ask

Even I don’t truly know

I’m a confused hollow shell of a 
person without a soul

But who would ever know?

I smile and laugh and play pretend

But who knows

This night might just be my end

I’m A Hypocrite

I’m such a hypocrite
I tell people
They are beautiful
And should never think differently.
Then I go
And think the opposite
About myself.

I say that no one is worthless
And everyone is special
But then I go and think
I’m worthless

I comfort someone by saying
Things always get better
And there I go,
Thinking nothing will get better
For me.

We Have Tonight

Just waking up next to you makes me breath a sigh of relief

because I am utterly and eternally terrified that you will disappear like mist through my fingers and ill be left with a heart shattered into oblivion when I grasp at empty sheets

The comforting weight of your arm around my waist, your soft breathing in my ear, the way you say my name in your sleep, it all adds up to the I Love You that I think everyday and never say enough

I don’t know how long you’ll be here, or how long i’ll get to be in your arms, but I do know that we have tonight. And right now that’s all I need